Module 3 Reflection Blog Melissa Burns
Module 3 Reflection Blog
Emotional Intelligence: Getting Results!
Melissa Burns
Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University
The four dimensions of El are self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and social skills (Big Think, 2012). How do these apply to me? Which represent my strengths and what areas do I need to develop? How have the El dimensions helped or hindered me in my performance and career? Neuroscience has been a hot topic in the sports world and in the corporate world and the understanding of neuroplasticity and creating and building neuropathways. Emotional intelligence is something that humans are constantly learning and having the ability to be flexible and to malleable to learn and adapt is key to evolving as an emotionally intelligent human being. For a person to become more emotionally intelligent, they need to put the actions that they learn and know into action. Understanding the neuroscience behind this helps to explain why this works. The part of the brain that knows what to do is in the neocortex and the part of the brain that does something is the limbic region and the limbic brain needs to do things in order to learn and helps to develop habits (psionline.com, n.d.). One form of action is visualization. Visualization is used in aerobatics as a way to practice an aerobatic routine on the ground, before flying the routine in the air. Visualization works because the neurons in the brain can interpret imagery as an equivalent to actual experiences and help to create new neural pathways leading to new habits or behaviors (Niles, 2011).
Self-awareness is knowing what we are feeling and why we are feeling it and acts as a moral compass (Big Think, 2012). Self-management is handling your distressing emotions in effective ways and aligning our passions with our actions (Big Think, 2012). Empathy is knowing what someone else is feeling (Big Think, 2012). Skilled relationship is putting the previous 3 dimensions together (Big Think, 2012).
In my job as an aerobatic pilot, I use visualization all the time. Visualization has helped me to practice my routines on the ground and to focus and better my performance. I never thought of this tool as a form of developing my emotional intelligence, but in a way it has helped me to have better control over my emotions and actions in the air and on the ground in the same way meditation can help. I suppose it has helped me to have a stronger sense of self-awareness. Empathy is another of my strengths when it comes to El. I am the oldest of 5 children and a mother and I think that my social situation has helped me to have empathy.
Self-management is certainly my weakest of the El dimensions. I have moments of strength and organization and feeling like I can handle anything that comes at me, but I also have moments of being tired and broken and short and I let things fall to pieces. I let myself become emotionally worn out and overwhelmed and hold on to feelings of anger and dread and regret for far too long. I have started to find that once I learn to acknowledge my own responsibility and part in a situation and find ways to learn from the experience rather than be a victim to it that I can start to let it go. If you haven’t read the book, Difficult Conversations I recommend you read it. This is my weakest point and I strive every day to get better. Daniel Goleman discusses compassion and his story about the Seminary students contemplating the parable of the Good Samaritan and whether or not they passed by the man in the street in need (TED, 2007). The students’ willingness to hurt had nothing to do with their contemplation of the Parable, instead their willingness to help was based on if they were in a hurry or not (TED, 2007). When we are self-absorbed, we are narrow minded and do not help those around us. When we can move from focusing on self to focusing on others, we will all benefit personally and professionally.
References
Big Think, (2012). Daniel Goleman Introduces Emotional Intelligence | Big Think. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/Y7m9eNoB3NU
Niles, F., (2011). How to Use Visualization to Achieve Your Goals. Retrieved from
PSI.com, (n.d.). Regions of the Brain Most Relevant to El. Retrieved from https://www.psionline.com/talent-management/emotional-intelligence/neuroscience/
TED, (2007). Why Aren’t We More Compassionate? Retrieved from https://www.huffpost.com/entry/visualization-goals_b_878424https://www.ted.com/talks/daniel_goleman_why_aren_t_we_more_compassionate?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare
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